How can I help ? All I have is Awe.

 beauty begets Beauty, grace finds Grace, awe meets Awe.

 When I share, the wonder of a magnificent sky exploding with soft clouds and shots of pink and light orange, I see the trees softly swaying even more.

 When I write of the never-ending joy of a flower blossoming, a friend shares a video of the same, in time lapse photography, capturing each minute of a flower opening its petals to the world. 

 The photographer says, he had little money, he had Awe and Time.

 When I speak of being a bird, and flying across skies, a reader sends a video putting poetry to motion.

 When there is this much beauty, in the world, the heart explodes. All our hearts explode.

 I asked myself, how do my words, my writing, this blog, help people. For the world moves forward, and round , as we help each other.

 I talk of beauty, and this awe, this wonder of mine, fills my words. I talk of gratitude, of the synchronized wisdom and fitting of all pieces of Nature, and friends send me videos, of the same.

 Making words real. Leaving me, this humble amazement, this trust at Nature’s providing for all its participants, to only, find me again.

 I become part of this whole. I am one of the million leaves of the tree, that gently talk to the wind.

 I become the feather of the bird, as it falls to become a bookmark in a poetry book.

 This awe at God’s Creation, humbles me and gently, softly, takes my ego away and makes my soul , a part of Nature’s World, His World.

 Where fear and worry are long forgotten, and only an easy trust, a simple joy and sense of light being remains.

 And so I am humbled into nothingness, into everything around me, I become a part of His Creation.

 I cannot help. I can only see the ego fall away at times, the mind quietens, and I become a part of the whole. A part of the whole, that is seamlessly run, that is helped , given guidance and provided for.

What do we do ? It is all done for us.

 And I bow. And gratitude and amazement is all there is.

 His Greatness.  

Living from our core of goodness and peace.

 Like a bird we want to soar free. Like a bird we want to huddle in our nests.

 Like a bird we want to spread our wings and explore speed, feel the power, the dynamic beauty go through our spirits as we tower over the world. We want to swirl and dive and swirl with absolute control and incredible grace.

 Like a bird, we want to relish the new oranges and pomegranates, the seeds in the sunflower fields, the fruit across many lands. We want to say, we saw the vastness, the white expanse as we stood on top of the mountain peak.

 Like a bird, we want to feed our loved ones, the best food, chirp with them, and together sing a beautiful song, in our warm nests. We want to be the little bird that is loved and looked after and fed, we also want to be the parent bird, feeding, caring, loving.

 We birds , we human beings, we want many things.

 This is the professional, personal debate. This is the ‘what does the heart want’, debate. This is the ‘what is more important, which role triumphs’ debate ! This is the ‘ how in the earth do we balance’ everything debate.

 This is the ‘what do we seek’ question ? Importance, faith, peace, material comforts, good education, social recognition, respect from family, value for service. This is the ‘where is the love’, question.

 Does the bird ask this question ? The bird does not play roles. It is first a bird, today a bird, in this moment a bird.

 As it dives, as it soars, as it finds food, as its sings, first, a bird.

 We let our roles gain control over us. We fight, and struggle and moan and delight over our roles.

 The bird asks, the bird lives, from its spirit, its core.

 What is our core ? Goodness, no matter what we do, work or play or stay at home. Footballer, entrepreneur, banker, artist, mother, brother, daughter.

 What is our core ? Peace, inside, no matter , what happens ;marriage, international transfer, illness, festivals of joy.

 What is our core ? To spread smiles, no matter who we’re with, colleagues , grand-parents, students, friends even ourselves.

 What is our core ? Courage, to be… to dive, to learn, to give, to rest – content.

 What is our core ? Deep gratitude and appreciation at the world’s beauty, at a lovely song, at abundance in our lives.

 Who are we , at our core ? God’s creation. Knowing from Him we come and to Him , we go in the End. (The Quran 2:156 ). And the world looses its power, and a trust enters our hearts, and we’re free and its beautiful.

 We can bring this, peace, wisdom, gratitude, to whatever we do. We can ‘be’ this.

 It can’t be about the roles I play, it is, about who I am, all the time. Alone in the sky, in a formation with other birds, in our nests with our family, a prayer in our spirits Who am I, all the time ?

 Who are you , at your core , today ?

Do you believe in magic, in goodness, in Grace ?

 Do I believe in magic ? I ask myself, as I watch a movie of a little girl who believes in goodness.

 Her father is presumed dead, and she’s made into a servant at her school.From riches to rags she goes. Yet, she believes that all little girls are princesses. Those in attics, and those in carpeted rooms. So she shares her hard-earned bread with a ragged,little girl whose selling yellow roses. Happy at the warm bread, the flower girl, gives a rose to the  poor princess, who in turn gives her rose to a sad old man Her father returns , as a neighbor with his memory lost. Yet when he hears his little princesses voice, it comes back to him. His little princess is his again.

 Its sweet and simple. Do I believe in magic I ask myself ? Again. Do I believe in goodness? Do I look at life, and know that all will be brilliant. Or do I look at it , and worry ?

 It’s been said that this moment, determines our lives. Am I happy now, in this moment ? My brothers are. Always joking, always happy, and its contagious to be around them. We’ve all seen difficulty and accepted it , as God’s Wisdom. We’ve all seen miracles, and rejoiced at God’s Greatness.

 I read somewhere else, that those that are grateful are happy. Its the gratitude it turns out, at everything in their lives, big and small, that makes them happy. That fills the heart with joy.

 Can I look into the future, at the endless sky with its white soft clouds, at the sea with its dancing, tuneful waves, and know that the ship will find home, will see new lands, will sight great birds.

 An eagle perched itself, on my terrace. At first, I thought it would attack me if I stood still, then I was glad my kitten was indoors and away from the bird. And then I asked myself, do I believe in magic, in goodness, and simply watched the eagles grandeur, its majesty and regal confidence, as it sat on my terrace wall. My fear turned to awe. The eagle was sure of itself, its nature, its power. A bird radiated this, at it sat on a high wall. Just like a little girl, knew that all little girls are princess. Special, kind, wonderful in our hearts

 What is magic ? Knowing goodness, begets goodness. Knowing that all is well, now and will always be. No matter what happens, we can always make others smile, share a story, a laugh, a good ear, a yellow rose.

 In that moment of listening and caring, we know, all is well.

Care begets care.  Laughter finds laughter, and goodness finds goodness.

And that to me, is magic , my friends. It’s the princess in all of us.

 So I look out, at the grand eagle, at the sky, at time ahead of me, and hope, that I may always be reminded , that all of us may always believe, in goodness and kindness, in laughter and care, in lightness and peace, in magic .

 The past, the present, the future, is and will always be – God’s Incredible Grace.  

Sadness and Trust.

Sometimes, sadness can be where we are.

Often we’re told to be cheery and positive, beaming and happy. I know I pride myself when I am happy and excited. It’s wonderful and I work to be happy at all times. To be at peace. I stretch this further to become, ‘to live in a world full of peace and joy’. It’s a rapture for me, a flowing of bubbles and pearls of excitement. Simply at the world, its beauty, its wisdom, its seamless orchestration.

The trees that musically sway as though a dance,the wind that blows as though a song. How seeds are planted and rain falls and fruit is borne and we eat… God’s brilliant earth. How we live learning ,growing, letting go of limitations and touching that core of stillness.

I love it. It makes me come alive.

Sometimes, oftentimes actually, it isn’t here. My folly, my silliness to think it will always be. My stubbornness even and thats the truth.

Sometimes we’re just sad. Sometimes, the home of the heart is empty, sometimes tears roll down our eyes, sometimes we withdraw into ourselves on a dinner table full of people, quietening even more.

Am learning that its okay. It’s okay, its good even to simply, ‘be where you are.’ I have delved into questioning before, understanding, learning, questioning.

Have I ever just been ‘there’, ‘where I am’, happy , sad.

So I did this time, was just there. .sad..and I let myself for a small while, a weekend. Then I just went about my week. I went to my arabic class to learn, to my creative writing class to teach, to my friends house to chat.

As I chased her little son, who chased a little cat, I laughed, I got out of breath, worried for the boy and the cat with two different coloured eyes as both of them got stuck behind a sofa. Chaser and the chased, crouching on their knees, stuck together, in perfect harmony, looking big eyed at each other, until I moved the sofa and created space to be free.

 The little boy runs out onto the terrace, under a beautiful sky and calls the moon , ‘ a ball’, and babbles around, no one knows what he’s saying, but we love it and he loves it too.

In my arabic class, I learn to pronounce words from the Quran correctly, not necessarily knowing what each one means, yet knowing that the words are God’s words, His Guidance for us, and I let their power, their refuge descend upon me. 

I read a book of writing on how words are a form of guidance and a way we label what we know, what we understand, ‘ball’, says the little boy as he looks at the moon, and he’s right, its his truth.

Sadness, Peace, Words are mine. In my creative writing class the kids write ‘ on their amazing dreams’, in superlative, for fun, to let their hearts, soar and mine does too.

I come home and read, the first verses of the Quran to descend,

‘ Read, in the name of thy Lord,

Who created man, out of a mere clot of blood:

Proclaim, and thy Lord is Most Bountiful,

He Who taught the use of the Pen,

Taught man that which he knew not.’ – (The Quran ,Surah 96 1:4)

I am humbled, there is much I do not know,much beyond me, much I need to practice from what I do know, the simple way of surrender and trust, to follow His Words, to see sadness in the eye, accept it, surrender and walk on.

I read on and another part of the Quran guides me,

‘By the Glorious Morning Light,                                                                                                       

And by the Night when it is still,

The Guardian-Lord has not forsaken thee, nor is He displeased,

And verily the Hereafter will be better for you than the present.

And soon will thy Guardian-Lord will give thee(that with which) you shall be well pleased.

Did He not find thee an orphan and give thee shelter,

And He found thee wandering , and He gave thee guidance.

And He found thee in need, and made thee independent.

Therefore treat not the orphan with harshness;

Nor repulse the petitioner( unheard);

But the Bounty of thy Lord,

rehearse and proclaim !

- The Quran (Surah 93)

 

So, I see my sadness, I say my prayers, I remember to Trust, to be kind and good, and His Greatness and Grace, to ‘rehearse and proclaim.’  

Finding Joy

What is Joy ?

To hear simple laughter erupt and fill the air, especially when a person recovering from an accident laughs, fully, from his heart. 

This is joy. To leave the past memories of pain behind, to forget this moments physical limitations, to truly enjoy the joke on TV, or crack one yourself. 

This joy, in this moment, is full of courage, of strength, of character and is all the more sweeter. 

What is Joy  ?

To witness a child’s sweet grin, which has no agenda, no thought. 

Just the truth, of that moment. 

To hear imaginary music and dance, waving her hands in the air, like a regal queen. And a queen, she is. 

For she truly enjoys and loves her art, her dance, herself.

This is love .

To thunderously laugh, despite the pain. 

To honour being here. 

To grin at a joke. 

To dance without music. Full of delicate grace.

Am humbled to watch this, to be inspired by this. 

The Joy of the Brave, the Innocent, The Courageous, The Naughty, The Kind. 

I forget my worries, I see my folly. Every stressful thought fades, becomes insignificant in the wake of this Joy

Joy is a choice. The blazing light that illuminates us, lightens us, makes us alive. 

Honouring the moment, believing in dreams, rock-solid faith..

Being always, a King or Queen. 

Humbled .  .  Joy ! What Joy ! 

The Magic of Joy ! What Joy ! !

A rainbow met my my dear friend up in the sky, and they looked at each other through an aircrafts window. The pilot announced the vision, the wonder. And on the ground, in my home, I could feel it too.

 Two best friends exchanged rings and a dream of love was born.

 Family and friends danced and laughed forgetting time and only joy remained. And our hearts brimmed too.

 A fellow traveller wrote of making magic from paper. The name little students give to orgami.

We make magic. From paper. In friendship. As the rainbow unfolds across the sky.

 Joy, what joy !!

 When I choose to be aware of the judgemental thought and smile at it , it leaves quietly through the door,

When I embrace who I am, and enjoy my being, a loveliness emerges in all that we do .

 When we see joy, it sees us too.

 We make magic and the rainbow unfolds across the sky .

Living with Ease : The Flow of Nature.

The moon is full and shining bright adding a glow to a lovely  night. The nights needed light, and God made the moon. So all life flows. So easily and seamlessly.

Everything the World needs, Nature needs, is here.

Whatever we require, emerges. Water for fish or fish for water, earthworm for the soil, dew drops for leaves. 

Life flows, providing, giving. Ways open. 

What a Great Love, an unsaid beauty. 

The splendour of synchronized living. 

A simple way of God’s sheer Grace and all encompassing wisdom, in its smallest details, in the grandest of designs.

May we flow too . Always. 

Uzma